You want to be an Expert?

If you want to become an expert in Islamic studies within a year, welcome and stay in Kampong Raja Uda and be my neighbor.

How? I will tell you how.

1. In one (1) year there are 52 weeks. You can attend 52 sessions of kuliah duha at every Sunday morning at the Pasar Tani ground nearby.
2. In one (1) year there are estimated 104 Saturday and Sundays. You attend all the 104 kuliah subuh.
3. Friday Ceramah pre Friday prayer, twice a month = 24 ceramah.
4. In one (1) year there are twelve (12) months and every month you have at least twenty (20) kuliah Maghreb with the exception of Ramadan, replace with tazkirah. So, 20 kuliahs X 11 months = 220 kuliahs.
5. Total within a year: 52 + 104 + 24 + 220 = 400 kuliahs. (Four Hundred).
6. For the Muslimah (Ladies) only, there are three (3) extra afternoon kuliah sessions per month = 12 months X 3 = 36 kuliahs = 436 kuliahs.
7. Aren’t the above numbers, great?
8. No need to pay a single cent just presence at the Mosque or Pasar Tani.
When the box or bag comes around, just insert whatever amount you like. Just voluntarily. “Fisabilillah”. (For the sake of Allah). On top of that every Thursday night after the Isyakh prayer, free drinks and snacks available in the Mosque. At the Pasar Tani, the trick is, choose to sit with someone loaded and can get complimentary roti canai and teh tarik.
9. If you are tired cross legging in the Mosque there is a coffee kiosk (Warung) behind the Mosque. Sipping coffee and follow the kuliah simultaneously similar situation at the Pasar Tani.

Capable and able to attend at all the 400 kuliahs (436) ranging from various subjects in Islamic studies + subsidiary subjects on politics from the visiting Ustaz within a year surely would turn you to be an expert. Perhaps you too can graduate as an Ustaz. Obtain the necessary credential (tauliah) and can start preaching at the various Mosques and Suraus. Good way to earn a living, no income tax. Keep staying for another year or two in Kampong Raja Uda, for what you know; you can even become a Mufti.

Perhaps I can become one soon as I am staying just behind the Mosque. If ever I absence myself from the Mosque for some unavoidable reasons, I still can follow the kuliahs vide the Mosque public address system.

That’s the best thing to happen after PR government toppled the BN. All the kampong residents would be Allah fearing human being and I can start removing all the iron grills at the windows and doors.

Good for the kampong residents as during the BN Government they were all suppose to be Infidels (kafir) and belong to the Jahiliyah Tribe. Awareness of the Islamic religion is now being planted to all the Muslims resident brain and hearts who were born Muslims and now all would be more knowledgeable and Expert.

After all the 400 or so kuliahs, I just hope during the forthcoming Aidilfitri prayer, there will be no more personality smearing addressing to the Mosque congregation as transpired during 2009 Aidilfitri. Surely the Ustaz must have preached that we Muslims must address and converse only about good things in the Mosque. Intentional and unethical dialogue in the House of Allah which is against the Rule of Allah taught by the Holy Prophet Mohamad (pbuh) is dishonoured and despised by Allah. I learnt this since I was a small kid from my late grandfather and from late Ustaz Manap at my kampong Surau, sometimes late 50s. If ever I break the law, my place thereafter would be forever in the burning Hell.